High up on your throne you've shunned the seeker of my heart
There's a plank in your eye while your stones tear me a part
And how you always think you're loving is no less short of a delusion
And how you're blind to how you're living causes this nations confusion
Lately I'm feeling I can't buy what they're telling me
They all say something but it really means nothing to me
And you like to think that this is all so easy
You like to think that this is all so easy
You look for question marks thinking you always have the answers
Yet you run away from any discussions with outsiders
And how you always think you're loving is no less short of a delusion
And how you're blind to how you're living causes this nations confusion
Lately I'm feeling I can't buy what they're telling me
They all say something but it really means nothing to me
And you like to think that this is all so easy
You like to think that this is all so easy
You like to think that this is all so easy...
Lately I'm feeling I can't buy what they're telling me
They all say something but it really means nothing to me
And you like to think that this is all so easy
You like to think that this is all so easy
You like to think that this is all so easy...
Tear me down, I'm never right
You've shown me how to live but die
I think if you'd stop feeling sorry for yourself
You'll see that your faults have hurt someone else
You make me feel so incomplete
I've had enough of you blaming me
I suffer for your pain I've never caused
I've tried, I'm so sorry
That's what he said to me
What have I done? What's wrong with me?
Guess I didn't notice what I didn't want to see
I focused too much on protecting my heart
That I forgot how to play my part
You make me feel so incomplete
I've had enough of you blaming me
I suffer for your pain I've never caused
I've tried, I'm so sorry
That's what he said to me
I suffer for your pain I've never caused
I've tried, I'm so sorry
That's what he said to me
A complex machine; mechanical
Sent to protect you from this world
Don't shy away, forget the past
I'm built to be what makes you last
And no no no no no
no no no
Come with me - I will give you life
Come with me - I will give you life
The burdens you bear; I'll give my life
Destroy the things that make us fight
And no no no no no
no no no
Come with me - I will give you life
Come with me - I will give you life
Come with me - I will give you life
Come with me - I will give you life
I hear myself speak - how is that even me?
Feel myself flinch - treat you like a disease
And I won't touch you even if you're crying
I'm mean
How is that even me?
I throw words at you and hope they stick like knives
Every intent to hurt you, can't believe my eyes
I need you but how do I expect to keep you mine when I'm...
I'm mean
How is that even me?
I'm sick and twisted ashamed of me...
I hear myself speak - how is that even me?
I'm mean
How is that even me?
Never did expect a hit like I got a heart attack - A smack
In the perfect place exactly where I'd forgotten how to care
But there you were
Like a cure
A silver lining
In my dark time
There you were
I don't know what your expectations are of me
Stay out of my business
I am this way, I just am this way
Up and down - I know I seem unstable
It's not your business
I am this way, I just am this way
I can't just flip the switch
Not for you
Can't flip the switch
Can't even do it for myself
Your comfort is not my concern
Don't know what you thought this was
I am this way, I just am this way
Further and further away
Everyone seems further and further away
That's the only way I seem to adjust
I can't just flip the switch
Not for you
Can't flip the switch
Can't even do it for myself
about
it was july : erratic
credits
released September 3, 2013
written by Susan Wintruba
production by Susan Wintruba
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